Passion

It is breathtaking to hear and listen to someone talk about their dreams– be it who they want to be, what they want to achieve and simply what brings joy and peace to their heart is music to my ears, and maybe “music” to all my senses.

Have you ever observed people talk about what brings them joy? Try looking at their eyes, there’s a certain sense of confidence and trust and if you’re lucky enough to see it, a sparkle or a twinkle in their eyes.
There’s a certain excitement in their voice, and it reflects in the timbre of the story and the rate it goes, as their story progresses. If you would notice their hands, it goes in all directions, as if they cannot contain the positive energy that comes off as they talk about their dreams, the people they love, and what brings them joy.

It is quite addicting, especially when you get to hear AHA moments, and hearing them talk about themselves, their journey of self discovery, and self love.

It is only then that you realize that you have had an encounter with the soul of that person, their full being. It is only then that you see how beautiful people are, and that you are, as well.

“And if you lose yourself, I will find you.” 

Last saturday, as I went to mass all by myself, because I think I wouldn’t make it to sunday mass, and attended anticipated mass. It has always been an amazing experience, going to mass all by myself. 

I have been beating myself up lately because I feel spiritually disconnected in the most important time to be connected with God. (Well, for me, that is). Things have been going haywire — in the most literal sense, in my life because I feel like i don’t pray. (i know, too much guilt, for no apparent reason). 

But last Saturday’s celebration of the Holy Eucharist was somehow a gentle hug, a reminder that I am still loved, and that there is a plan for me. 

For several days, or probably weeks, I have been doubting myself– in all aspects. I have been too focused on one thing in my life that I have the tendency of forgetting the rest. It’s like I allowed my work to define who I am, but it’s only a part of who I am. I have been making excuses for everything because I want to rest, I want to have everything under control. I want things done my way. 

And yes, you’ve guessed right. The lesson once again is about surrendering, letting go and acceptance. 

Last Sunday’s gospel reminded me of who I really am — my spiritual contract, and also reminded me to open my eyes, because maybe, I haven’t been seeing clearly. 

And I did open my eyes. 

The world is beautiful. My world is beautiful, and that everything that is happening is just a perfect plan unfolding for me. I am reminded that life isn’t perfect, and I don’t need to force perfection upon it. 

It also reminded me to take a breath. *deep breath*

Surrender and let go. 

How magnificent it is to realize that I am not alone.